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Parents vs. non-parents: game on?

Posted by: Tanya Ryan-Segger (Parenting & Children's health)
16 July 2012

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I have a gorgeous friend within my closest circle of girlfriends who is yet to have children. Whenever we plan a get-together, this friend (we’ll call her *Maggie*) does the lion’s share of organising, and she’s always the reliable, go-to person in the group. I appreciate this and say so often, but I can’t help thinking that my friend is being taken for granted a little.

Maggie has always claimed she is happy to take on the extra workload of being our social coordinator (believe me, it isn’t an easy job!), as she is the sole friend without children. But last week, after appearing a little stressed, she admitted that her life is full and very busy - yet she feels unjustified admitting it because she doesn’t have kids. Wow.

Maggie’s admission really hit hard and got me thinking. Are parents today guilty of complaining or talking up just how busy family life is? Parenting is undoubtedly a 24/7 job, but choosing (or otherwise) to focus on other pursuits, like, say, a high-powered job, elite sport or helping others, also makes for a hectic albeit different lifestyle. It really shouldn’t be about who is busier, should it?

The pace of contemporary life is frantic - regardless of individual circumstance, so maybe, for the sake of everyone’s wellbeing, we should all just take a step back and chill out!

If I’m being honest, a small part of me assumed that it was acceptable for Maggie to manage the social affairs of our group because she doesn’t have kids. And you know what? That’s so unfair. Life is about individual choice and the cards we’re dealt.

For some, it’s about juggling kids and work commitments. For others, it’s staying at home to look after a family, or choosing to work 14 hours a day and then volunteering during their so-called “down time”.

It’s not a competition and no, one group should feel more justified in claiming that they are busy, should they?

So what’s your take on all this? Do you think there is an increasingly divisive gap between parents and non-parents? Do we all need to take a step back and just RELAX?

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